tt

[Alan Sondheim]

tt

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gather wed sep 22 01:55:39 edt 1999 towards sixth space appointing direc-
tions, winds begin, center disappears, unholding, beings flu##ered in
vertical flight, space of memory, data acquisitions, tensor calculi and
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skies the colours of meteors wed sep 22 01:57:03 edt 1999 into the ninth
of planetary realms, for what remains in high wind but clu##er, destruc-
tion of family photograph, history, talisman, it's here among the planets
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mind begins to go, tears where thoughts gathered. the once. wed sep 22
01:59:17 edt 1999 tenth and now long walking, forge##ing with fearful
eyes, tornado wed sep 22 01:59:48 edt 1999 i wonder i don't remember her
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staff people helping me all through this, mommy mommy brought forth by
cisco router! mommy mommy, please get be##er and i will mail you on the
big machine and i will read news from you on the news machine and i will
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BISI you'd be##er retire and turn your job in East Anglia over to Aecci!
Right now!
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York, I bet! Glad to see you were over at LINDISFARNE - did you see all
the neat stuff there? Was it really all wri##en on vellum? Did they have a
lot of sheep? I bet they had a lot of sheep!
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Hi Mom! What a mess! I can hardly reach you from here! We're down in
HROFESCESTIR at the moment! It's pre##y terrific - you should see all the
bridges!
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age##y they had go##en up to the mountain fastness
ash past villages burned to ash, there was always someone,
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chmod model, who everyone dreamed about wanting to
chown own. she was the center of a##ention in
clear the clearing, where the liberation army constantly
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Communique: I am seventy-eight years old.
Communique: Youth's altered a##itude to questions of sex is of
course 'fundamental' and based on theory. Many people call it revo-
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Report: I am certainly not in favor of this or that!
Report: I do not smoke a bourgeois so-called cigare##e!
Communique: The whole of society will have become a single office
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Report: I do not agree with those of the dictatorship who accuse me
of paranoia, although I have been commi##ed of paranoia by the so-
called 'state authorities.' I do not smoke a cigare##e, a victim of
the bourgeois mind!
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--someone in the tomb of lenin where messages touching my asshole i know
it will be filled with clu##er--touching my paranoid prick i know you'll
never tape lenin--this is tape-lenin trying to deliver a tape which was
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But sometimes as well people a##ack me for how I feel. I mean, how could
I be a##acked, I'm just expressing myself, what I'm going through. I
don't want to lay it on anyone else, I just want to be understood. I
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Now I have someone who will listen to me when I express my rage, when I
want to kill myself. I know I will be a be##er person. It is enough that
they listen, they don't have to say anything. My computer has become my
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I've learned that I can discuss things be##er with you online than I can
with my doctor, and I know now who to avoid when I need to look for a
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wanted to try something else, that I had the support of the online commu-
nity. I said nothing else ma##ered, my whole world gets caught up in this
or that medication and I know there is more to life than that.
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There are people out there in this town who could really benefit from all
this on line, they would learn how to be##er control themselves. I think
so many people in this culture are hurting or wrecked, I don't know where
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like at one time. I couldn't even sit down without shuddering. Now I have
the time to even be with my parents a li##le, we're beginning to under-
stand each other. But it's because of this screen, nothing else. And they
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and I can't talk to anyone else. She says I've been drinking a lot but
it's not working any more. I don't know what's the ma##er with me. I just
start crying sometimes. She's got long blond hair and beautiful blue eyes,
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says, but I now I'm not. I'm not as good as anyone. Oh fuck, I can't stand
this. She's scratching herself, cu##ing through her skin; you can see her
bleeding through her ta##ered clothes. I've got a secret, she says, I
can't tell anyone, how good I am, what a person I am. People say I'm beau-
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cries that she needs comfort and consolation, why won't everyone be quiet
just for a li##le while. She has u##er rapture on her face, the rapture of
pure despair. I'm fucking afraid of dying, and yet I want to kill myself,
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yours. She disagrees with everyone, she knows it. New Clar dances around,
her lips parted. Old Clar pays no a##ention, she's got a horrifying pre-
monition about the death of everyone. We're all going to die a horrible
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smart. Oh hell, she wants another drink, just one more, fuck, things can
only get be##er, can't they? She's scratched open sores around her
breasts, you can see them through her ripped clothing, they're bleeding.
Oh hell, pay no a##ention to me.
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I know I'm boring you; I can't help it. It's not funny, it's real life,
for God's sakes pay a##ention to me, oh God, please, please, please don't
leave me like this, please help me, honest, I'll kill myself if you don't,
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les, do you know that? There are tracks all over me, not just my arms. You
might think I'd know be##er, but I like them. They scar me, show you where
I've been.
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It's not just that though. I've got be##er friends than you ever will.
They'll all betray me in the end. But there's a pull in the world, I seem
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Do you know I can sing? You've probably never heard me sing. Someday I'll
sing for you, even now. You can stand a li##le? You might like this.
There's a record I use for background, like karaoke. Just a second. Let me
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~text," that she belonged within quotation or the parenthetical~ Still,
~Mary should have known be##er; one more day of Mary or Travis writing
~from directory, and Bob, too, would have to die~ aculog authlog cron
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I like the old time. I like thinking about the old time. God lets me do
that, god is pre##y terrific, is a good god.
I want to sleep now.
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Mail archive archives bin boot core dev etc export holding hosts htdocs
kadb lib log lost+found mnt net pcfs restoresymtable sbin se##erm src
staff sys tmp users usr var vmunix vmunix-lkm vmunix-raid zz
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The specifics of the leverage would not ma##er - just as the details of
universal equations spell out varying phenomenologies, but their very
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which the laws of distribution hold, and within which we may fall in love,
throw a ball, or speak, as if difference were upheld, or sha##ered.
cat chio chmod cp csh date dd df domainname echo ed expr hostname kill ksh
ln ls mkdir mt mv pax ps pwd rcmd rcp rm rmail rmdir sh sleep s##y sync
test zz
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sd2cgsd2dgsd2egsd2fgsd2ggsd2hgsd3ags sd4bgsd4cgsd4dgsd4egsd4fgsd4ggsd4hgs
sound3gspeakergss0gst0gst1gstderrgst ##yE1g##yE2g##yE3g##yE4g##yE5g##yE6g
##yp4g##yp5g##yp6g##yp7g##yp8g##yp9g ##yq0g##yq1g##yq2g##yq3g##yq4g##yq5g
##yqcg##yqdg##yqeg##yqfg##yr0g##yr1g ##yr8g##yr9g##yrag##yrbg##yrcg##yrdg
##ys4g##ys5g##ys6g##ys7g##ys8g##ys9g ##yt0g##yt1g##yt2g##yt3g##yt4g##yt5g
##ytcg##ytdg##yteg##ytfg##yu0g##yu1g ##yu8g##yu9g##yuag##yubg##yucg##yudg
##yv4g##yv5g##yv6g##yv7g##yw0g##yw1g ##yw8g##yw9g##ywag##ywbg##ywcg##ywdg
##yx4g##yx5g##yx6g##yx7g##yx8g##yx9g tun0gtun1guhid0guhid1guhid2guhid3guk
vnd0agvnd0bgvnd0cgvnd0dgvnd0egvnd0fg vnd1egvnd1fgvnd1ggvnd1hgwd0agwd0bgwd
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you do make me!
un para o pk##olkx corr yu lat sgqk eua
oh thank you jennifer thank you
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Ou##ages MAY OCCUR.
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Japanese Amusement
Nigh##ime Japan
Nikuko's Popular Imagery of Japan
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the work will remain in spite of its ruin
in the stories of mothers and sons i am wri##en
in the stories of fathers and sons i am wri##en
i am a coward small and fearful
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Il n'est jouer qu'en maladie,
Le##re vraye que tragedie,
Lasche homme que chevalereux,
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Kristevatumor and such mavericks as Roheim. Within the astute rationalist
construct of mathematicocancerscientific developmen##umor Jennifer ob-
serves Kleintumor Penrosetumor Marrtumor Moravectumor others too nucancer
merous to mentiontumor not for a moment forge##ing Minsky and the uncanny
precancer science of Euclid. Such is Jennifer s casetumor that she does
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mor he looks like this! she saidtumor making the uglicancer est cutest
li##le face! That old Alan! every moment when the word leans it becomes
another word and language gains ascendence across body and function as if
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will not know then what has occurred unknowledge transpires and is every-
where there is a non-ma##ering of unknowledge that will be the same and
substance ruling or ruined same and ruling substance of the day or forlorn
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day of gone time or world forlorn unknowledge towards a glimmer or horizon
towards transpiration and non-ma##ering this is a prediction and a truth
of and from the year 3000
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