\/\ reading this makes me all warm and giddy

[integer at www.god-emil.dk]

01 ost.europa perzonaj ekr!t

>hi

unbearabl ! tell u.


>if you would love me you would answer my question.
>I don't like that you ignore my questions.

! l!ke xyz uho hav 01 futur +
2x uho = hav 01 pazt.

u!ch r u.


>that's nothing. 
>imagine that last year i have met the Dalai Lama on the street,
>and -to my biggest surprise- he bowed three times in front of me.

it is better to be beautiful than good.




>I have no reason to doubt. are you happy with this kind of love?


love loves ugliness.                                    




>even many angels would like to become mortals.

ugliness is the only reality.




>you are so terribilistic-horroristic, 

it is only in reality that one is free.      [m9ndfukc.macht.fre! +?


had typed: freedom isn't important.  



        rilke: ! u!sh 2 konfusz u 22222!!!!!
        
        als dat zo plezierig is, ga vooral je gang  \z\

        A good marriage is one in which each partner appoints the other to be 
        guardian of his solitude, and thus they show each other the greatest possible trust. 
        A merging of two people is an impossibility, and where it seems to exist, it is a 
        hemming-in, a mutual consent that robs one party or both parties of their fullest 
        freedom and development. But once the realization is accepted that even between the 
        closest people infinite distances exist, a marvelous living side-by-side
        can grow up for them, if they succeed in loving the expanse between them, which 
        gives them the possibility of always seeing each other as a whole before an 
        immense sky.





what is outside ur reality.
what is outside ur imagination.

                                           uuuuuuuu __... *


>i wish you would be in love instead of counting orgasms,

u kan melt !sz-kubez +?
ver! uel dzn. 1.2....3 ________________.... mor +?


                                           * ___... in writing it is often beautiful.




>>>you would drink coffee insted of coffeine, and vine instead of alcohol,
>>>eat delicious food instead of calories and proteines...
>>>+ you are cruel to the poor woman in the uno.due.tre movie,
>>>everybody can fell on the stairs, but not to let her to climb back!!!!!
>>
>>__... but ! d!d let her kl!mb [!f she u!shez 2 she kan reach dze ver! lazt ov.
>
>I wish you would be much much more positive, you could also push her up.


xyz = kan onl! push 2x az far az dze ztok ekxchange.
2x rulz dze velt abr ____...

http://www.m9ndfukc.org/data/filmz/did.you.do.that.mov





>visualizer tool called fire, 

                        tzo u do not loze ur ua! !n dze lab!r!nth.




>i suspect it comes from you.

l!ke dze !sz kubez. meltd +?



>it changed colour, did you do that??

                    2x kanot bear med!okr!t!          \\.mov




>if you would love me, 

              juzt u +? [dzat def!nz 01 l!m!t doeznt !t +?
                         d!frnz ov objkt doez not altr z!nglnesz ov pasz!on.
                         !t !ntenz!f!ez !t]





>you would take me to the opera, concerts and cinema.
>&you would bring me flowers.

abnormal pleasures kill the taste for real ones.           





>you would take me to the opera, concerts and cinema.
>&you would bring me flowers.


         `uel knoun mazterp!esz + ___... in writing it is often beautiful`

!f ! atendd dze zpektaklz avec 01 elegant xy = 01 much > ekz!larat!ng ekzper!ensz ud b 4 
ever! 1.  do u not th!nk tzo +?




love desires ugliness. you have convinced me.

         chptr 8 - kouard. 
         !f ! g!v u kred!t u knou ver! uel uat hapnz.
         u _r g!v!ng m! kred!t.
         ! ma! b tr!ng n o t 2.
         u alua!z s h l. 
         !f she !znt [or !z !t !z] v.good
 


"when that was dead he would be free. it would
kill this monstrous soul-life, and, without its hideous warnings, he
would be at peace. he seized the thing, and stabbed the picture with it.

there was a cry heard, and a crash. the cry was so horrible in its agony
that the frightened servants woke, and crept out of their rooms. two gentlemen,
who were passing in the square below, stopped, and looked up at the great house.

`whose house is that, constable?`

`mr. dorian gray's, sir,`

they looked at each other as they walked away and sneered. 
inside, in the servants' part of the house, the half-clad domestics
were talking in low whispers to each other. old mrs. leaf was crying and
wringing her hands. francis was as pale as death.

after about a quarter of an hour, he got the coachman and one of the footmen
and crept upstairs. they knocked, but there was no reply. they called out.
everything was still. finally, after vainly trying to force the door, they
got on the roof, and dropped on the balcony. the windows yielded easily: 
their bolts were old.

when they entered they found, hanging upon the wall, a splendid portrait 
of their master as they had last seen him, in all the wonder of his
exquisite youth and beauty. lying on the floor was a dead man, in evening dress,
with a knife in his heart. he was withered, wrinkled, and loathsome of visage.
it was not until they had examined the rings that they recognized who he was."











01 mozt del!z!ouz ov all l!f 4rmz   [pla!ng r!lke avec to! = zuch 01 temptaz!on]


-

>I WANT TO BIOSCULPT WITH YOU! very much so!!!

______... mazterp!esz



<you make everything so ugly                         >watje

the essence of beauty = ugliness.                     mm. men = watjes. boys - n+o
any regrets +? letz read.





>i am now the circulation of meaning, of the eternal possibility,
>communication as a being.
>
>don't give me a name, i'll disappear,
>a child, an idiot, a madman,
>a name without a name closed in my world.
>i want to be free to wish, to wish to disappear,
>in a pulsation, blended with you,
>my heavenly lover.
>you change my self into
>pure energy, into a fluid, a rush, a pulsation of love.
>without fences, without name, without meaning
>only the lively movement of a double being.


z.




>> zk!p!ng dze modl c!t!zn !earz r ue +?
>
>dont like those. from 29 i want to jump to at least 65.

z.



>> besides, it was she whom i luvd and kould not, therefore look upon
>> without that disturbance, without that desire 4 something more
>> which destroys in us, in the presence of one whom we love,
>> the sensation of loving.
>
>that's how nn feels?
>well, then, it's good that nn cannot look upon her.

2 kure dze zoul b! meanz ov dze zenzez + dze zenzez b! meanz ov dze zoul ____...






>nn, haven't you asked for some models a few weeks ago?
>have one most delicious ost europa xx.

did not think she was delicious. 
z...



... comme ca - http://www.m9ndfukc.org/data/picz/u.volunteer.jpg

quelle erreur!!!                                        


                                                                [+!z dzat zpasz]




the girl smiled.  "dorian", she answered, lingering over his name with 
long-drawn music in her voice, as though it were sweeter than honey to
the red petals of her mouth--"dorian, you should have understood. but 
you understand now, don't you?"

"understand what?" he asked angrily.
"why i was so bad tonight. why i shall always be bad. why i shall never act well again."

he shrugged his shoulders. "you are ill, i suppose.
when you are ill you shouldn't act. you make yourself
ridiculous. my friends were bored, i was bored."

she seemed not to listen to him. she was transfigured with joy.
an ecstasy of happiness dominated her.

"dorian, dorian," she cried, "before i knew you, acting was the one
reality of my life. it was only in the theatre that i lived. i thought
it was all true. i was rosalind one night, and portia the other. the 
joy of beatrice was my joy, and the sorrows of cordelia were mine also.
i believed in everything. the common people who acted with me seemed to 
me to be god-like. the painted scenes were my world. i knew nothing but shadows,
and i thought them real. you came--oh, my beautiful love!--and you freed my soul
from prison. you taught me what reality really is. tonight, for the first time
in my life, i saw through the hollowness, the sham, the silliness of the empty
pageant in which i had always played. tonight for the first time, i became
conscious that the romeo was hideous, and old, and painted, that the moonlight
in the orchard was false, that the scenery was vulgar, and that the words i had 
to speak were unreal, were not my words, were not what i wanted to say.

you had brought me something higher, something of which all art is but a reflection.
you had made me understand what love really is. my love! my love! prince charming! 
prince of life! i have grown sick of shadows. you are more to me than all art can ever be.
what have i to do with the puppets of a play? when i came on tonight, i could not 
understand
how it was that everything had gone from me. i thought that i was going to be wonderful.
i found that i could do nothing [slowing down +?]. suddenly it dawned on my soul what 
it 
all meant. the knowledge was exquisite to me. i heard them all hissing, and i smiled. 
what could they know of love such as ours? take me away dorian--take me away with you,
where we can be quite alone. i hate the stage. i might mimic a passion that i do not feel,
but i cannot mimic one that burns me like fire. oh, dorian, dorian, you understand
now what it signifies? even if i could do it, it would be profanation for me to 
play at being in love. you made me see that [011001]"

he flung himself down on the sofa, and turned away his face.
"you have killed my love"







>[ if this was a fairy tale u would now disappear].
>
>01test.


dze bl!nd foldd woman zagt.

uen ur e!ez rezt 
no matr hou t!red dze! uear
dze! r!ze aga!n

+ azk.

r ue m!szd no where +?


and water _and imagination grow.





>>that lived in my closet, and was scaring me with things
>>that it knew, until i found it and scared it, and it ran away, for no particular
>>reason.
>>
>>why?


... because she isn't perfekt.





>have missed you in the analogue world. Entities have talked about
>antiorp. describing her human formz. xy formz. Or maybe [   ]
>hallucinated. konfused. intoxicated.
>
>wanting to be closer to you. in any form.


... because he isn't perfekt.





<and which bothers you more +?

zom l!f 4rm or odr: beauty itself must take on earthly form if it is 2 summon humanity
                    towards its own perfektion.


__... if you know so much tell my name.








[* leav!ng  - i shall never see you again. i shall never think of you. i shall never mention 
              your name. you are nothing to me now. my god! how mad i was to love you! what a fool 
              i have been. you don't know what you were to me, once. why, once ... oh, i can't bear 
              to think of it ....
              


01 .ru l!f 4rm

>we have ...
>not a lot, but at least chance to meet.

whom would you like to meet -
dream shadows or bordered nerves + fibers +?

never found them very compatible.
when they meet it seems an abdication
of sorts. it is why 



zom l!f 4rm or odr: then the increasing warmth of life led him to be less dualistic.
                    the material world became informed with the heavenly light.



a.hhhh ... more model citizen abdications. 

when one discovers the saving isle one's visions flee.
a new world is wedged between one's soul + the ultimate sea.

to realize a dream is to lose it. 
the satisfied are the most wretched.


death is the ultimate lover
the climax of all passions.              






[* bak aga!n


>> tranzm!t!ng zvrl art!klz momntar!l!
>> !n regardz 2 ag!ng - !f !ntrztd \ t!me perm!tz
>
>let me read some of them.  it is the hot topic the last years. very
>crucial as well.

dzatz uat chptr 8 za!d.





>what are your thoughts about human aging?

! kan zolv all puzzlz - alone.

and .... hou !z dze mozt del!z!ouz ov all m!rorz 2 da! +?






>are you aging =cw4t7abs?

onl! uen u lv h!m



>is spreading yourself across separate entities making you age less?

chptr 8 th!nkx u r 2 `fr!ghtnd` 2 read !t tzo ....
letz read dze t!p!kl prezkr!pz!e pak.age



>infectious thoughts + emotions with children.

s!nsz 99 proznt ov l!f 4rmz = zlkt dz!z l!f ekxtension pack.age
! dez!dd 2 forego dze elongatd l!ne  [although do konfesz 01 fatal atrakz!on 2 l!nez ov an! k!nd. 
                                      ! atr!but !t 2 m! z!mpl!.zuper!or  ost.europa ch!ldhood]



>spreading the seeds. Planting them before they dry up and die.

1 !ear !n 1 da!.                    az uel auare u arnt red! ma!z ...
                                    et aprez u dez!d on dze ___... protokol [! zpez!al!sz !n ztretch!ng  
                                                                             da!z akrosz !earz. b!enzur.



>i don't fear. I love. fearlessly.


that ____... u+i shall find out.





>would be different but would be grown
>just for u... u uant?

.. mmmaybe. why dont you tell everything about it ___... then i shall give 2 you my 
answer. [she v!euz dze trap + sm!lez] 
have told you i admire you. but - if one is to believe that one is starving to live
and not to suffer ___... mmmmmmm +?






>[this is not a fact, it is not made, it BECOMES 01]
>
>but it is a fearsome process.
>
>+ once we venture down that path
>there is no stopping any more. 
>no looking around.
>no running away
>fear must be terminated.
>
>warning you:
>it is very painful
>+ can be deadly
>[01 xy lifeform already deceased because]
>
>but it it is [in some sense] true that u+i are 01 person,
>this process must yield successful.
>
>comfortable?
>
>what is your answer?


he laughs in answer.

http://www.m9ndfukc.org/data/picz/4.01.v.good.r!zn.jpg




=cw4t7abs:  u u!l loze d!sz 1.

       nn:  http://www.m9ndfukc.org/data/filmz/z!mpl!.zuper!or.mov



you like hearing your self talk!!!

more than you can possibly imagine.


or


i wish 2 paint your world wet + watch it dry.

= wish to be the day of your experience; 2 observe plants grow.
how snowflakes form + the flames that melt them away.

my pursuits are mundane for no ordinary life form i am. i am 
the pot-pourri of mystery in its most awe inspiring scale.

i've no crusade in m9nd. i leave perception all to you.


 

<r u mad +?

slight smile.
my kondition at the time was a kind of madness.
`salvation` came from a totally unexpected source
which simultaneously brought 01 neu element into life

tzo phpz __.. madl! !n lv.                 [all which is unresolved by love remains suspended for ever +?

                                            dze eventual awakening of self.  ma!z undertaken 4|4|4 ___...



>u!th dze ztor! +?

...`expanse between them`


                        dze kurta!n falz az chptr 8 lookx on del!z!ouzl! konfuszd.

















Auriea Harvey <a at e8z.org>

>>nn - .bio is tzo very verdi + eternally interessant. i sweeeaaaaaaar.
>
>
>zplendid.izolatsion   +?
>
>
>
>
>
>
>sweeeeeetly [b.cauze i need lv too]


z!!!!!!!!!!!!l vous plait ... you know very well only perfekz!on deservez love.
[do i kontradikt my `self` +? uuuuuuuuuuueeeeeelllll




zwrl - !tz a karn!val!!!!!!!!!!


        ne!n. = 01 feazt.



             \ r u kr!ng +?

               !f !t hurtz l!v!ng !n 2 uorldz 


                   or

                   anodzr ko!nz!densz [ever!dz!ng haz b!n za!d]

                   > tzo she lozt her.cccelz. !n theatre.
                      > uen !t meetz l!f she kr!ez.