[Syndicate] a lost lamb...

[furtherfield]

on 9/9/01 11:57 AM, saul ostrow at so5 at nyu.edu wrote:

> 
> 
> furtherfield wrote:
>> 
>> (a spontaneous poem/prose declaring that re-invention is not always the way
>> home. And there are many people who are homeless - physically, mentally as
>> well as emotionally. The most lost, are the one1s who hide behind the mask of
>> logic, the god of objectivity. The doctor1s knife. For behind that muffled
>> disguise is a subjective entity, riddled by the very natural state we know as
>> dysfunction. And dysfunction is dare I say it? A kind of truth. Like a self
>> lie. Like doubt, like death, birth and of course that thing that we have
>> labelled LOVE...)
>> 
>> marc garrett
> 
> 
> So let me get this straight if you can recognize such dysfunction and
> deception in others , does it mean

a) that such an analysis is not applicable to the person making it

It certainly is applicable to me, if that is what you are saying.
I am also stating that dysfunction is not an issue really, more of a default
in our human make up. That we all have to come to terms with this - so I
suppose its how we all choose to explore it, whether we accept it, deny it,
enjoy it, hate it, share it etc. It's part of life...and just because I
choose to see it in others does not mean that I am critisizing them, it just
means that I am looking, acknowledging possibly what I recognise as part of
my own many selves.

Yes, I am dysfunctional. I was born dysfunctional, not feeling quite at home
in the world. Then I started to meet others in all walks of life declaring
consciously and unconsciously their own dysfunctions via their activites,
words, ideas and beliefs. The world is jammed packed with dysfunctionality
and there is nothing wrong with that.

b)  that if one can perceive this state in others,  they do not  suffer from
such a delusions themselves.

MMM, I am not saying that delusions are dusfunction. Delusions are part of
the dreamscapes handeddown to us by others (Hollywood for instance,
institutions and the media) and then we build our own interpretations on top
of them. It's entwined within misinformation and confusion with what is part
of our own inner cohesiveness and inherited (cultured learning)
circumstance.
For instance we have embodied knowledge, part of the genetic process and
then we have virtual knowledge, information given to us.

c)  that all people need to be told when such analysis is applicable to
oneself,

No, not really. But if people recognise the link, or empathise with the
feeling of dysfunctionality it can be said in many different ways without
conflict. For instance I find dysfunctionality a beautiful thing - it
declares to me the vulnerability of someone. I do not have to mention it to
them personally unless I want to share it with someone as a friend. In a
way, it is an intimate subjectivity, that onely oneself should declare if
possible - to one's self first. Where it goes after that is purely
speculation. Although history does give examples of people who have denied
self questioning in aim of providing themselves with powerful goals. A lot
of my work is based on being dysfunctional - I find that that reaches a
larger audience who seem to get the gist, it communicates. The subject
matter itself could be anything, I do not actually use the word
(dysfunction) itself much.

d)  that such an analysis  is itself a sign of the very dysfunction  it
attributes to  others ,

Yes. 

e) some of  the above,

I agree again.

i) its best not to analyze others unless your willing to analyze yourself,

I agree again to a point, although I have learnt via working with homeless
people in the Uk (for 9 years now) that analyzing others does not have to be
so black and white. Observation for me has taught me a lot, also just
chatting and listening, an everyday sort of thing.

f) its a case of the pot calling the kettle black,

To a point - why critisize others unless you're prepared to put a part of
yourself in as a reference. I like so many others possessed the delusory
dream of being famous for one's own, special understanding on life art etc.
But that means sod all unless you are willing to play the game - be part of
the system that demands you to bow to its own protocol. I did not, so I am
paying for my own mistakes, for asking too many awkward questions to the
exact people who held the key to the gateway to the glitterball famous
experience. I am a hypocrit in many ways and that - is part of my
dysfunction.  

g) that such situations lead to bad and self indulgent poetics,

That can be relevant in some cases - but I believe that you are just judging
by dislike of the content alone and not the spirit and generosity of it.
Plus also I personally do not feel bad if you do not think that this peice
does not rate as far as you are concerned in the scheme of things. My
poem/prose worked in the sense that you were generous enough yourself to
respond - and I respect that in its own right.

h) all of the above

possibly - may be...

i) you don't know, you just had time on your hands,

In fact, I am a very busy person. But I value the coomunication that happens
on these lists as practising my art and going through the process of work
and life. And yes, I do know but only to a point and I am still learning and
will never know it all and do not claim such a thrown, and whoever does is
lying through their teeth.

j) that it is now time for you  to go to bed and yet a good rest,

thank you Saul :-) 

k) all of the above,

possibly - may be...

l) what's to worry ? not  my problem ,

I must admit, I do tend to read into things, activities and people's
intentions a lot. And its all part of the looking process. It can get rather
confusing sometimes, true. Each day I read books, all kinds, chat with
friends and associates about the issues of life, politics, art and life. Go
on the net - look at what net artists are up to. Do my own art. Work. Enjoy
the experience, activity of love making. Tune into pirate radio- life is soo
busy but it is an excellent one. I enjoy the sun as it shines above me right
now and I genuinely want people to work it out, get right for themselves and
have a decent way of living without repression and all that sort of thing.
So my problem is that I am too interested in people I suppose - as well as
ideas. 

m) I thought I was being clever, but now recognize its now time to
scrutinize 
my own values, ideology and perceptions, announcing that the sky  is falling

Personally, I am not interested in proving that I am clever too people. I
grew out of that little trap years ago - there's no point. I have learnt
that there a lot of clever people out there but they are very stupid at the
same time. For instance a professor made be an excellent teacher but is
terrible at taking responsibility in relation to issues of love. We all have
our blind spots and it is up to ourselves to overcome them. I am learning
due to the disposition of not knowing enough, therefor I am a student of
life. I have learnt a few things but even what I have learnt changes in
time. And the sky is not falling in, in fact it is a beautiful day today.
I've already been for a brisk cycle ride before breakfast and the sun is
still shining...

respect to Saul

marc garrett
http://www.furtherfield.org